A Parent’s Role in Recruiting

 

1. Don’t speak to a college coach when they are recruiting your son/daughter.
I have said this one countless times on my Twitter (@TheChrisRubio) and even within this blog, but for some reason, parents still aren’t grasping the concept. The coach will want minimal contact with you. They are recruiting your son or daughter,  NOT YOU! Be cordial and answer their questions IF they are addressing you, otherwise butt out. Like I have spoken in the past, when you were dating your husband or wife, did you want go out on dates with them or their parents? Same thing.
 
2. Don’t speak for your son/daughter amongst adults. 
If a coach, or any adult with some authority, asks your child a question, let the child answer. Nothing worse than when I ask an athlete their height and weight and they either look at mom or dad for them to speak OR the child doesn’t even have the chance to speak before the parent chimes in. In doing this, it shows that the parent is overbearing and the athlete relies way too much on them. This is a red flag for a coach since they immediately begin to wonder if the athlete will be handle real life when mommy and daddy are not around. This one can completely crush your child’s recruit-ability, especially if you are looking at a school that isn’t located on the same block as the athlete’s home.
 
3. Be Supportive Mentally
This one shocks me, but it is a reality. Many parents simply aren’t supportive at all with their kids and can be downright negative. Very hard for an athlete to believe in themselves if their own parent doesn’t believe in them. You would be surprised at how much an athlete can improve PHYSICALLY when they are encouraged in a positive manner MENTALLY
 
If you feel this may just be you (little too negative at times), try the Oreo approach. Oreos are a simple food with two black cookies surrounding a frosting center. Think of the cookies as positive statements and the frosting as a negative one. Therefore, if your son didn’t have the greatest snap you would say “Your form is looking good. You had a bit of an issue with not getting your eyes all they way through, but that snap was definitely coming back quick!” You got your criticism in, but sandwiched it in between two positives. Trust me, it works and it works well. 
 
4. Don’t be overbearing 
You didn’t really think I would leave this one off the list did you?  If you want something and your kid doesn’t, it simply won’t work out. Going to college or the pros is a wonderful thing, but if both the athlete and the parent aren’t on board, it will never work out or be a train wreck if it does. It has to be a united front or the child will end up despising the parent and the sport. Any positive that once came from the sport will now be looked as a negative. Remember, it is just a game. Instead of really riding your kid before a game and stressing them out, how about just trying a simple phrase like “Have fun out there and try your hardest!”
 
Being overbearing doesn’t just pertain to parent and child. It can mean flat out harassing coaches, writers and recruiting services. There is very fine line between being persistent and being annoying. You cross it and your child could very easily be blackballed. If your child is that good, they will already know of them and won’t need to be told…over and over again.

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